Why Your Toddler Keeps Waking at Night (And How to Help Them Sleep Better)
You thought toddlerhood would bring more sleep but instead, your nights have taken a turn. Just when it seemed like you’d finally cracked it, your toddler starts waking again. Night after night.
Toddler night wakings are far more common than people realise - they're just not talked about. Maybe it's the fear of being judged, or the pressure to have a “good sleeper.”
Society loves to tell us toddlers should be sleeping through the night by now. But the evidence says otherwise.
If you're lying in bed wondering, "Why is my toddler waking up every night?" this one’s for you.
Why Your Toddler Is Waking at Night (And Why It’s Totally Normal)
Let’s start with the reassuring bit: night wakings are developmentally normal.
In fact, research shows most toddlers wake at least once a night.
The difference?
Some can settle themselves. Others still need a bit of help.
Here’s why your toddler might be waking:
Illness or Teething
Discomfort is one of the biggest sleep disrupters. Offer extra cuddles. Don’t worry about "bad habits." Comfort is never the wrong choice.
Big Life Changes
New sibling? Nursery transition? A family holiday? Toddlers thrive on predictability, and change, even small ones can throw sleep out of whack.
Separation Anxiety
It often resurfaces around 18–24 months. Toddlers are exploring independence, but still deeply crave connection. Night is when that separation feels hardest.
Developmental Leaps
Language bursts, potty learning, climbing everything in sight - these cognitive leaps can temporarily disrupt sleep.
Overcooked or Undertired
A nap too long or too short, or a bedtime that’s just slightly off, can make night wakings more likely.
The Truth: No One Sleeps Through the Night (Not Even You)
We all wake at night. The difference is: adults know how to settle ourselves. We roll over, fluff the pillow, get a drink.
Toddlers?
They call for you.
Their night waking isn’t bad behaviour - it’s a sign they still need support. And sometimes, it’s simply about habit, comfort, or connection - not a problem to be fixed, but a phase to be supported.
What You Can Do to Help Your Toddler Sleep Better
You don’t need to sleep train.
You don’t need to ignore your instincts or leave them to cry.
Here are some gentle, responsive strategies that can reduce night wakings and support better sleep:
Respond with Reassurance
When your toddler wakes in the night, your calm, consistent response sends a powerful message: You're safe, and I'm here. Over time, this builds trust and emotional security, even if they still need your help to resettle.
Look Beyond the Obvious
Sleep disruptions aren’t always caused by big changes like moving house or a new sibling. Sometimes it's the little things - like a tough moment at childcare, feeling left out during play, or getting upset at home over a boundary - that quietly build up and show up at night.
Toddlers process their emotions through connection, and bedtime is often when it all spills out.
Prioritise Connection at Bedtime
Even 10–15 minutes of focused, one-on-one connection before bed can make a huge difference. Think cuddles, stories, or silly games - anything that fills their emotional cup and helps them feel close before separating for the night.
Use Gentle Choices to Reduce Pushback
Bedtime often brings power struggles, especially for toddlers craving independence. Offer small, manageable choices (like which pyjamas or which story) to give them a sense of control while keeping your boundaries in place.
Create a Sleep-Positive Bedroom
Spend time in their room during the day, not just at bedtime. Add cosy touches like soft lighting, family photos, or their favourite soft toy to help them feel calm and comforted in their space.
Check Their Sleep Needs
Has their nap routine shifted? Are they getting too much daytime sleep? A small tweak to their schedule can go a long way toward reducing wake-ups.
Co-sleep (If It Works for You)
Sometimes, the path of least resistance is also the most restful. If bedsharing feels right for your family, it can be a safe and effective way to ride out a tricky patch - without worrying that it’s a forever thing.
If your toddler’s bedtime is more chaos then calm then this blog is for you,
Read Why Toddler Bedtime Feels So Hard (And What You Can Do About It) blog HERE
Night Wakings and Toddler Temperament
Some toddlers are naturally more sensitive and crave closeness, especially at night. If your child needs more support, it’s not a reflection of your parenting - it’s a reflection of their personality.
These traits might be exhausting now but they’re also signs of empathy, sensitivity, and strong attachment.
And no, you're not creating "bad habits" by meeting their needs. You're creating safety and trust.
Bonus Tips to Support Better Night Sleep
Keep water nearby
Toddlers are masters of the midnight “I’m thirsty!” routine. Make sure a water bottle is within reach.
Duvet struggles?
Teach them how to pull it back over themselves, or consider a toddler sleep bag for less fuss.
Comfort objects
A soft toy, an item of clothing that smells like you, or a favourite blanket can help your toddler feel connected through the night.
Room-sharing with siblings
Sometimes this can offer reassurance and reduce nighttime fears—after the novelty wears off!
Gentle Support for Better Toddler Sleep
Toddler sleep isn’t just about routines - it’s about connection, confidence, and calm.
And if you're ready for things to feel a little easier, I can help.
I created Toddler Sleep Circle for parents just like you - who want real solutions without cry-it-out or rigid rules.
Inside, you'll get support, community, and expert strategies that actually work for this age group.
Or start with my free guide: Five Simple Steps to Stress-Free Toddler Bedtimes.
Final Thoughts on Toddler Night Wakings
Your toddler waking at night isn’t a sign you’ve done something wrong—it’s a sign they’re still growing, still learning, and still need you.
With gentle tweaks, the right support, and a little grace for yourself, better sleep is possible.
