Real Sleep Facts Every Parent Should Know
Parenthood is a journey, an up and down one, filled with joy, challenges, and, for most, sleepless nights. I think it’s important to normalise the realities of infant sleep and arm you with the facts.
It's crucial to reframe expectations and recognize that waking during the night is a normal part of a baby's first two years of life.
Understanding Infant Sleep Cycles
We ALL wake during the night - adults and babies alike. However, the contrast lies in how we handle these nighttime disruptions. As adults, we often seamlessly reposition ourselves in bed, take a quick trip to the bathroom, or sip some water before falling back to sleep.
The situation is quite different for our little ones, whose sleep cycles last a mere 40 to 50 minutes, as opposed to the 90 to 120-minute cycles experienced by adults. It’s perfectly normal if your baby is waking ALOT throughout the night, seeking your support to navigate in falling back asleep. Whether it's a nappy change, a comforting feed, or a soothing cuddle.
Why night wakings aren’t bad
The frequent waking of babies during the night, while undoubtedly exhausting for you, can be seen as a built-in safety mechanism - ensuring their own protection.
During deep sleep or "slow wave sleep," babies enter a stage that, while essential for their development, poses potential risks. In this phase, babies may suddenly stop breathing.
For a healthy infant, this prompts a natural response—arousal. The baby awakens briefly, adjusting their breathing and ensuring their well-being. However, for infants with certain risk factors, this protective response may not occur.
Dispelling the Myth of 'Sleeping Through'
The elusive concept of 'sleeping through' the night often takes centre stage in parenting discussions, akin to the Holy Grail of parenthood. Yet, the definition of 'sleeping through' is often misunderstood. It does not entail an unbroken 12-hour stretch, as commonly believed. Research reveals that a 5-hour uninterrupted period qualifies as 'sleeping through.'
This clarification is crucial in dispelling the myths that surround this milestone, easing the pressure that parents often feel and the judgement they might perceive.
Numerous factors influence the duration of a baby's sleep, with temperament playing a significant role. Is your baby a soother, easily self-soothing back to sleep, or a signaller, requiring more external support to settle? Understanding this can help you tailor your approach to your baby's unique sleep needs.
Age-Specific Sleep Averages
Understanding the age-specific sleep averages will hopefully provide you with solace as you navigate the ebb and flow of your baby's sleep. Research indicates the following,
3 months : 2.2 night wakes on average (Paavonen et al., 2020) with 15% sleeping through.
6 months : 2.5 night wakes on average (yes, I know, an increase! Lots going on developmentally) with 30% sleeping through. (Hysing et al, 2014)
8 months : 2.4 night wakes on average (Paavonen et al., 2020) with 20% sleeping through.
12 months : 1.8 night wakes on average (Brown & Harries, 2015) with 50% sleeping through (Goodlin et al. (2001)
18 months : 1.1 night wakes on average (Paavonen et al., 2020) with 20% waking 2 or more times.
2 years : 0.9 night wakes on average (Paavonen et al., 2020) 15% waking 2 or more times in the night.
Strategies for Managing Infant Sleep
Acknowledging that regular waking is a normal part of infant sleep is a crucial first step, but the reality of sleep deprivation is challenging, to put it lightly! When you find yourself struggling to function on limited sleep, taking intentional actions to improve the situation becomes essential.
Here are some practical steps to consider,
Understand Your Child's Unique Sleep Needs
Every baby is unique, and understanding your child's temperament and individual sleep requirements is the first step. This knowledge provides reassurance and forms the foundation for how you support your baby to sleep.
Be Alert for Red Flags
Stay vigilant for potential indicators of underlying issues affecting your baby's sleep. Red flags may include noisy breathing and snoring, discomfort or pain, restlessness (tossing and turning throughout the night), night sweats, excessive daytime fatigue.
Regular Outdoor Activities
Engage in daily outdoor activities. Just like adults, children sleep better when they're physically tired. And exposure to natural light not only promotes physical health but also plays a vital role in resetting circadian rhythms. This can help regulate your little one’s internal body clock, contributing to a more consistent sleep-wake cycle.
Quality Time
Spend quality time bonding with your little one during waking hours. This not only strengthens the parent-child connection but also fills your baby's metaphorical 'love bucket.' A child who feels secure and loved is likely to approach sleep with a greater sense of comfort and ease.
Calm Down Time
Create a soothing pre-bedtime routine to signal to your baby that it's time to transition into sleep mode. This could include activities like gentle lullabies, or quiet story time. Consistency is key, as it establishes a predictable sequence that helps your baby prepare for sleep.
Create a Sleep-Conducive Environment
Optimise your baby's sleep environment by ensuring the room is dark, quiet (white noise can be beneficial in drowning out disruptive sounds) and maintained at a comfortable temperature (16-20°C).
Bedtime routine
The predictability and soothing nature of this routine help your child anticipate the upcoming bedtime, creating a sense of security and comfort.
Sleep Associations
Consider incorporating positive sleep associations into your baby's bedtime routine. This might involve a special nighttime cuddly (not until a year old), a calming scent, or a sleep bag. These associations can become comforting cues that can help your baby resettle themselves during night awakenings.
Be Patient and Consistent
Understand that the journey towards longer periods of sleep is gradual. Be patient and consistent in implementing changes.
And finally…
While there is no predetermined age for your little one to sleep through the night, rest assured that it WILL happen. Every child is unique, and their sleep patterns will evolve over time.
